There are many reasons for feeling tired and lacking motivation, but one of the most common is simply being overwhelmed.

No matter how busy we are used to being, there is a limit for all of us and it can come as an unpleasant surprise to people when that limit is reached, or exceeded.

There are many theories as to why this occurs, but perhaps one of the most useful ways to envisage the problem is to understand that even if you are not actively working on a project, it will take up some space in your mind. 

Your brain works in much the same way as a modern computer - different parts are designed to do different things, it can work on multiple problems at once and in general only one problem at a time can be worked on consciously.  The computer shares memory between its functions and if there is not enough to go round, some functions have to wait.  Most computers will slow down noticeably if too many apps are running at once, and your brain is no exception.  Each task you are working on uses some resources, even if you are not working on it consciously and the more you have going on, the less resources each task has.  Eventually the background work takes up enough space that there is not enough capacity to work on conscious tasks and this is what leads to the overwhelmed, exhausted, burned-out feelings. 

If you are not computer-minded, imagine a box full of lego bricks.  Each time you need to find a specific item, you need to sort through all the other pieces.  If you have many different pieces, finding one amongst many can be very hard.  If, however, you remove some of the pieces you do not need, the job becomes a lot easier.

Getting our thoughts in order can be a very powerful way of getting back in control of our lives and the simple business mnemonic RAFT can help.

Although developed for managing paperwork, the technique can be applied to most life situations, with a little stretching...

In organisational terms, RAFT stands for REFER, ACTION, FILE, THROW - whenever you get a piece of paper in your hand, you should either Refer it to someone else to deal with, deal with it immediately, file it away or put it in the waste.  Turning this to tasks is a little harder, but it does make a lot of sense when you think about it.  For mental health, we re-organise it a little so that the order becomes more logical, if less easy to pronounce:

THROW

This is the most important part - true mental de-cluttering.   It is the first and the hardest part of the process because it involves the internal acceptance that you have taken on too much, right now cannot be all things to all people and you are perhaps going to have to let some people or yourself down.  That is really, truly hard to accept but it is a fact and the world will continue to spin on its axis if you have to turn someone down who you might be able to help so remember the three Ds:

Decline.  It is ok to say no, you are not able to help.  If someone asks you to do something, decline politely (it's fine to quote medical grounds!) but feel free to offer advice or suggest someone else who might be able to help.

Disconnect.  If you have made promises you really should not keep, let people know.  They will almost always understand and may well respect you more for being able to accept this.  Of course, if they have major plans that depend on you helping it may be another matter but where it is minor things, be prepared to let people down.

Declutter.  We all have projects we wish we had never started and if we are honest with ourselves we know we will never finish.  Get rid of them.  Accept it was good while it lasted but now it is over and walk away.  Everything from half-completed craft projects to garden plans not yet started.  Drop them, close them off and never return.  Try giving incomplete projects to friends or to the charity shop.  As many as you can, let them go.

REFER

Anything that got through the throw process should be referred to someone else to do - as far as possible, get other people to do the jobs that need to be done. 

Now is the time to call in favours and get people you have helped to fix things for you.  Perhaps a friend might help you tidy up or clean.  Maybe it would be better to get a builder to fix the leaky roof rather than DIY.  Wherever you can, if you can't throw it away, get it fixed by someone else.  It might seem a lot of effort, but getting children to do a fair share of chores is always worth the intial stress!

Get help and don't feel bad accepting it.   You'll be back on your feet and supporting everyone else soon, just right now you need some maintenance so don't be afraid to ask for support.

FILE

This is the 'last resort' really so before you read any further, go back to Throw and Refer and be sure that you have done all you can in those two areas.

Filing means mentally putting things away.  Think of all the jobs you still have left to do.  File all of them than can wait.

The best way to do this is to pick a date, perhaps 3 months in advance.  Christmas, Easter, Queen's Birthday and Labour Day work well.  Anything that can safely wait until after the next one of those goes in the mental box and every time you feel pressured by it you tell yourself you will not deal with it until after the agreed date.  You have already decided this is safe so there is no risk in leaving it.  When the date comes round, review the items anew then move on to using the next date.  This works really well as long as you don't have too many filed jobs and you are sure they can wait.

ACTION

By now you should be down to a manageable list of tasks that cannot wait.  These are probably either key stressors or day to day tasks.

Writing lists can be very helpful for the less common tasks.  You cross off each task only when it has been completed - job done, mess tidied up and everything put away.

For more important tasks, break the tasks down into manageable parts and set SMART goals that allow you to complete each part effectively.

Although RAFT is a very good way to get out of a hole fast, it is an even better way to keep out of holes in the first place.  If you start applying this technique as soon as you begin to feel overwhelmed (as opposed to waiting until you are worn to a shred) you will quickly start to take control of your life and be even more productive than you ever thought possible.

Credits:

Working Late Image: Alan Cleaver